Service Day: IRIS and Blanket Craft--March 15th Meeting Recap

Our March 15th meeting focused on a very difficult topic--infant and pregnancy loss awareness.  We were so fortunate to have one of our former group members come talk to us about her experiences.  Abby spoke about her feelings during that time and since, and how her faith in God helped her work through the losses of three precious children during pregnancy.  We hope that by hearing Abby's story, our members were able to feel the comfort of learning how others have survived similar losses, and maybe even give them the opportunity to share about any losses they or others close to them may have experienced. At the end of Abby's talk, we honored babies in heaven by adding butterflies to a Remembrance Tree.

Brenda came back up to the stage and shared lots of great information about IRIS (Infants Remembered in Silence, Inc.), a group based locally in Faribault.  While we may or may not have personally experienced a loss like this, it is extremely likely that we know someone well who has.  Statistics show that 1 in 4 pregnancies results in a loss.  That is a huge number!  When someone close to you is grieving, we sometimes don't know what to do or say.  Brenda shared the following tips, given to her by Diana Sundwall, the Executive Director of  IRIS.

• You don't have to say ANYTHING.  When you see them, hug them.  That says more.  Don't avoid them if you see them.
• Say the baby's name instead of just saying "the baby".
• Ask to see pictures.
• Cry with them.
• Don't send fresh flowers.  They do not last forever and when the time comes to throw them out, that is another loss.
• Remember and acknowledge the due date and/or the date of death.
• Bring food.  They often cannot physically handle making food for themselves.
• Don't say, "Call me if you need anything." They won't call.  Just go to them and do things to help.  Clean their house, go for a walk (and maybe don't even say anything during the walk), help with other children.
• Realize that this grief will last.  It often takes about 2 years for moms to feel comfortable in their own skin again.  They need to be cared for--and for more than just the first couple of weeks.

After sharing the tips with us, Brenda introduced our next service project.  IRIS accepts many different things for donation, but we selected to collect scrapbooking supplies to donate to the organization.  These supplies will be given to moms and dads to help make remembrance books of time spent with their children who have been lost.

Here is a list of items that would be helpful.  We will be collecting these items during our two April meetings:

Scrapbooking supplies:
--Papers that are baby and/or child-themed, but also patterns and solid colors as well.
--Stickers and embellishments that are baby/child-themed, letter stickers, flowers, nature and other themes that could be appropriate.
--Adhesives, but ones that don't dry out quickly if not used.  Also photo corner adhesives work well.
--Scrapbook albums
--If you have extra tools like decorative scissors or punches or likewise, I am sure they would appreciate it.

Other items to collect for the not-so-crafty:

--Kleenex or Puffs (but not the type with lotion in the tissue.)
--Baby yarn in colors other than yellow (green, pink, blue, lavender, etc.)
--Prayer shawls
--New or barely used baby quilts/blankets
--Baby hats that you knit (call IRIS for sizes at 507-330-2148) or see the post on the Fellowship Hall page from Christine Harinen.
--Books on grieving and infant/child loss that have helped you in the past that you would like to pass on to other grieving parents.

Check out the IRIS website for more info or for support www.irisremembers.com or to talk with someone call between 9-5 Mon-Fri at 507-330-2148.   They are located near downtown Faribault but they serve the surrounding area.

If anyone is interested in helping Brenda help organize the scrapbooking room at IRIS one evening, please let her know at brendaboone1221@msn.com.

For the last part of our meeting, Ashley came up to explain our craft/service project.  Each table was given two large pieces of fleece fabric and we used the remaining time in the meeting to make tie-blankets to be donated to a local nursing home.  We were also able to enjoy fellowship and conversation at our tables while working together!

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Our "Silver Spoon Award" winner for the week is Ashley Resler!   Here is the recipe for her winning dish:

Pineapple Dump Cake

1 can (20 oz or so) crushed pineapple
1 can cherry pie filling (or any fruit of your choice)
1 box yellow or white cake mix
1 stick butter

In 9x13 pan, mix together pineapple and pie filling. Spread evenly in pan. Sprinkle dry cake mix evenly over top of fruit. Cut butter into thin slices and set on top of cake mix. Bake at 375 for about 30-40 minutes or until golden brown on top.
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Announcements:

We are planning to hold a garage sale this spring and we need your help!  Here's what you need to know:

• Please start collecting items from your home that you would be willing to donate to our sale. We will be looking for baby and kids clothing, gear, toys, supplies, etc. and women's clothing and accessories (maternity and regular).  We will not be including men's clothing or any household items. 
• Our dates are set!  The sale will be held Friday, April 22 from 4:00-7:00 pm and Saturday, April 23 from 8:00 am-1:00 pm
• We will be accepting donations and setting up for the sale on Thursday, April 21 from 9:00 am-7:00 pm, but we would appreciate it if the items could be dropped off as early in the day as possible!
• During the garage sale, we will be hosting a bake sale. Please consider donating baked goods for us to sell as part of our group fundraiser.
• We have space for up to 5 vendor booths.  If you sell Thirty-One, Scentsy, etc. or another home business/craft, you can reserve a spot to set up your items during the sale. The cost to reserve a spot is $20 and you will need to bring your own table.  The spots are first come, first serve, so don't wait!  Please contact Denise Carr or Holly Dodds to reserve a spot.
• Lastly, and most importantly, we will need many VOLUNTEERS to make this sale a success.  We need people willing to take shifts sorting and pricing items, people to work during the sale, and people to help with clean-up. You may bring your children with you! Please look at your calendar for these dates and mark off some time to volunteer. Look for a sign up sheet at our next two meetings! These fundraisers help our group function and we need your assistance to make it happen!

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Looking forward to our next meeting on April 5th:

At our meeting this week, we will be hearing from a speaker on the topic "How to curb the compulsion to compare".  You will also learn a little more about the "behind of scenes" of our MOPS group by learning about the responsibilities of each different position on the steering team.

The BRAVE and EXQUISITE tables are on for breakfast and the SPIRITED table is in charge of bringing snacks for MOPPETS this week.  Please bring an unopened box/bag of snacks, remembering to keep allergies in mind.  Recommended items include Cheerios, Kix, Chex, Goldfish, and Ritz crackers.  Thank you!

Anger--March 1st Meeting Recap

First off, I apologize for the delay in this post.  I had to miss the meeting due to my son being sick, so I was a little (ok, a lot...) slow about getting the information updated here.  Many thanks to Joni Biebighauser for taking pictures for me and Denise Carr for writing up a summary of Ann VandeZande's talk for us!

Before we launch into the main topic, I want to make sure to fulfill a promise.  In the rush to finish up the meeting after Trivia Day, I missed getting a picture of the amazing trophy created by Brenda Boone for the winners of our trivia competition.  Here she is in all her nerdy glory:

If you would like to visit her in person, check out the Strong table at the next meeting.  She will live there until the end of this year.  Next year on our 3rd Annual Trivia Day, another lucky table will get to enjoy her presence.  Until then, keep practicing those Trivia skills! ;)

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Anger: Beyond Management       a summary by guest blogger, Denise Carr

Ann Vande Zande spoke to us about anger at the last meeting. She did a wonderful job talking about a very hard topic. I will try my best to summarize her talk from my notes.

 The first thing she talked about was that we often experience unnoticed shifts or stressors in our life when we have children, which could be lack of time, sleep, freedom, relationships, good conversations etc. Our unmet expectations can dominate us. Psychology says we can have phantom pain or phantom self, which is everything we see on Pinterest, Facebook, etc.-- basically ideas we have of ourselves not living up to what everyone else is doing with their lives. I.e.: wonderful decorated and clean house, perfect birthday parties and great all natural made from scratch meals your children happily eat (maybe that’s just mine). She told us about a breathing technique: breathe 4 seconds in, hold for 7 seconds, 8 seconds out. 

 

Ann told us that the biggest detriment to discipline is being angry. The best way to help your kids is to learn to be okay when our kids are upset or struggling. Your child's struggle is not about you. We cannot stuff down our anger; it is physically harmful to just stuff it inside. The movie Inside Out is a great movie that talks about anger. We can use our words to be a curse or blessing. Forecast good stuff, not negative, about ourselves and others. Our words carry power. When we are angry or our kids are angry, it’s okay to change locations, move rooms, tell your child “I need to calm down before we talk.” 

When dealing with your child who is angry or upset,
1.) Tell them you understand, and validate their feelings
2.) Discipline if needed.
3.) Forecast the positive
4.) Let them feel their own emotions.

Take ownership of our anger.

God showed us unmistakable mercy and unshakable love when he suffered our sins upon the cross.

In the story of the bleeding woman, God called her out and made known who had touched him. He called her out of her sin and let it be known that she was healed.

Isaiah 53:5 But he was wounded for our transgression, he was bruised for our iniquities; the chastisement of our peace was upon; him and with his stripes we are healed.
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Our "Silver Spoon Award" winner for the week is Anna Perkinson!  Anna is another repeat winner! Here is the recipe for her winning dish:

The scone recipe is from taste of home:
http://www.tasteofhome.com/recipes/cinnamon-chip-scones
 

My changes:

extra 1/4 cup of buttermilk

Omit the butter/sugar on top (though good this way too) and instead top with cream cheese glaze when they come out of the oven.

Here is my glaze recipe (good on many things!):

4 oz softened cream cheese

1 Tbsp butter (softened)

2 cups confectioners sugar

1/2 tsp. vanilla extract

2-3 Tbsp milk